After the fairytale ends: How divorced women rebuild their lives inside the Muslim world.

No doubt that divorce is not that type of event we would like to experience in our lives once we decide to say „yes” and build a life with the one we believe is the right person for our future. It’s in our human nature to experience the desire of having a family in this world, and Muslim societies support this aspect even more than other type of communities, showing a strong understanding when it comes to marriage and traditions that a man and wife should follow. From a very young age, Muslim girls are being educated by their elder female family members to become rightful brides, sisters and mothers, so things should go perfectly fine when the marriage time comes for each of them. But what happens if the fairytale turns into a nightmare? How these traditional young women manage to rebuild their lives once their partners dissapoint them in a society where the man is seen as women’s protector?

I had the chance to speak to some of these broken heart ladies and their confessions surprised me in a pleasant way, when I saw how strong they can be. The conclusion? Women nowadays are decided to fight and win no matter where they are born and what culture they embrace. The divorce is no longer considered a black dot in their social profiles, but a reason to show the world that in each of them there is a leader or a mother ready to stand against the world for her children’s wellbeing. Here is a relevant story to be mentioned in our today’s article.

Nadia, 28 from Syria: „At the beginning I was scared thinking that I will no longer have food or clothes for my 5 years old boy. My husband used to beat me and wait for my money that I was earning as a maid, working for some wealthy ladies from our neighbourhood. He usually used to spend my money at his regular coffeeshop with friends. Always smoking shisha and never thinking to find a job that would make his son live better. Once, after having a conversation with my father who passed away last spring, I’ve decided that I would no longer allow him to spend my earnings on his outgoings. He got angry and extremely violent with me, in front of our son. The divorce process was long and difficult, but that was not the worst part. The most difficult side of the story for me, as an Arab woman, was to introduce myself in front of people, as a single mother. They are used to blame you without actually knowing anything about your story. By time, things got better and I started to earn even more money than before. Now I sell handmade bags, too. Is not alot, but it helps me feed Youssef”. After finishing her confession, Nadia tries to hide her tears behind the blue hijab that covers her hair. She’s so beautiful and young. And brave too, I would say. Of course, inside the Arab world Nadia is just one of so many divorced women cases, but she is the hope that in the future, young mothers won’t be that scared to let behind toxic marriages. She was lucky too, because in some other cases, divorce means also a separation between a mother and child. This action comes usually from father’s family side or from the ex husband, himself, angry for being left by his wife. And even if Qur’aan, the holy book of Islam, blames whoever separates a mother from her baby, some Muslims men choose to adjust the religion according to their personal ego, and in this way they leave behind the true teachings of Allah. I hope that in the future less and less mothers will experience the pain of child separation, and wives will be brave to end a marriage when they’ll see the red flags of abuse. God bless humanity!

Aleppo’s Old city, still an „Arab-Islamic” cultural treasure

The current look of Syria’s cities and what give them a rare architectural beauty, is the result of over one thousand years of Islamic influence over the country. Although for some it may sound difficult to describe how an „Islamic city” should look like, considering that Islam is a faith and not a style for defining how a settlement or location should be, in some areas we may find key features closely related, architecturally speaking, to the „Arab-Islamic” space. These key features include many types of mosques, starting from larger Friday worship places to smaller size ones, public fountains, Islamic schools known as „madrasah”, where from young ages students learn the principles of Qur’aan, the holy Islamic book, hospitals, public bathhouses, trade agencies known as „khan” in Syrian society, and monumental tombs built for religious and political personalities. Before the war, Aleppo’s old city was considered as being one of the best preserved „Arab-Islamic” cities from the world, and even if today parts of it are slowly being reconstructed, the „medina” was seriously damaged by many military confrontations during severe battles. It may be hard to believe for many of us, but even in such extremely dangerous and insecure times caused by the war, many Syrians refused to leave the city. A city of ruins and sadness, but a place where you can still see the historical beauty on the walls filled with bullets. Great efforts are being done by the locals to revive the past, for bringing Aleppo back to normality, some shops are working full time, some kids dare to play and smile as in any other parts of the world, but there is much more to be done for the Syrians who saw terror and lost their families just few years ago. There are people who need to fill their hearts with hope, again. Gradually, many of the refugees knock at Aleppo’s doors, coming from abroad, missing their land, and hopefully, with the power to bring back city’s beauty and glory.

beautiful architecture of Aleppo.
Muslims praying inside the city affected by War

The high price of popularity: between social media and family traditions.

Palestinian girl Isra’a Ghareb (photo) is just the last case of honor killing happened few weeks ago, inside the conservative society of her country69952505_2507591386001868_4437697593346097152_n. She’ve been killed for using the social media in a shameful way, according to her family’s point of view. Last year, because of her fame, daring outfits and opinions on the social media, Iraqi model Tarah Fares and other two well-known women from the same country, (Dr. Rafeef Al Yasiri and businesswoman Rasha Al Hassan) passed away in strange circumstances, reported as being murdered by conservative religious groups, according to local mass media. All these victims were interested in beauty market and were leading female social media figures in Iraq. In 2016 Pakistani model Qandeel Balooch, has been killed by her brother while sleeping, for some selfie pictures, considered highly offensive for her family’s reputation. And these are just few cases of honor killing, where women pay with their lives for not having protective laws on their native land. Should females from conservative societies stop using the social media to protect their lives or they must act brave and keep going by following the Western trends?